Click here to return home.

Go back one page

Permission granted by author for anyone to distribute this
writing free of charge (including translation into any
language)...under condition that no profit is made therefrom,
and that it remain intact and complete, including title and 
credit to the original author.

Ezekiel J. Krahlin

(a parable for the 21st century)

© 2000 by Ezekiel J. Krahlin
(Jehovah's Queer Witness)

So Jesus returns to earth, and in his explorations of this new
world 2,000 years later, he notices an abhorrent prejudice
running rampant against his favorite kind of people:
homosexuals. Yes, you got it, Jesus is gay...100%...a

So while strolling through Berkeley incognito (disciples in
tow), some hetero creep walks by and mutters to Jesus:
"Faggot!". Well, Jesus can't take it anymore, whips out a can
of pepper spray, and generously applies it to the bigot...who,
of course, suddenly falls to the ground in painful
convulsions. Jesus replaces the canister into his pocket.

"Jesus, Jesus!" cry his confused disciples. "Why did you use
pepper spray, when you could have simply pointed your finger
at him, and turned him into stone...or banished him to the
deepest pit of hell...or struck him dead with lightning?"

Jesus deliberates on this a few moments, then concludes:

"That was then; this is now."