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-------------------------------------------------------------- Permission granted by author for anyone to distribute this writing free of charge (including translation into any language)...under condition that it remain intact and complete, including title and credit to the original author: Ezekiel J. Krahlin. Ezekiel J. Krahlin http://www.gay-bible.org -------------------------------------------------------------- BASEBALL: THE ALL-AMERICAN HETERO OPIATE (A True Tale From The Castro. Eat your heart out, Armistead!) © 1997 by Ezekiel J. Krahlin (Jehovah's Queer Witness) November 24, 1989 Letter to the Editor, B.A.R. 395 Ninth Street San Francisco, CA 94103-3831 Editor: Embittered reply to Peter J. Davey's letter of Nov. 23 (entitled "The American Pastime"): Peter, in all the years we've known each other, I've never heard you talk about baseball, let alone attending even one game...so why your sudden outrage against an anti-ballpark letter? Since we are not presently talking to each other, I can only assume that you are suffering post-earthquake anxiety. Nevertheless: for shame, Peter, for shame! In your final sentence you proclaimed: "After all, baseball is the American pastime, and...it is going to remain that way." So tell me, Peter, will all those other American pastimes continue; such as (anti-masturbatory) Mom, (toxin-sprayed) apple pie, and (God- vindictive) homophobia? Sorry, Peter, but big-time sports such as baseball, football, and rape, have always been an outlet for the assertion of the worst aspects of the (heterosexual) male ego -- at least in symbol, if not in action! Since I don't follow sports schedules, I sometimes find myself riding BART with a crowd of ugly, beer-guzzling homophobic geeks on the way to the Oakland Coliseum or Candlestick Park...so don't tell me big-time sports are not dominated by a faggot-bashing populace! Can you blame any gay man (or straight woman) for throwing up at the thought of perpetuating these nauseating "traditions" of straight male dominance? Peter, since when did you become so macho? Is it your Welsh blood boiling (Celtic PMS)? Or because I don't pop in at Castro Station anymore, to be your favorite sounding board? Well, you say that when attending a ballgame (which I doubt you ever did), you don't make it known to the world you are gay. (What you mean is, you don't dare!) That's only because homosexuality cannot be identified by the color of your skin, the shape of your eyes, or any other physical endowment. You also claim that the lesbian/gay community supports our baseball teams...an exaggeration at best. The fact is, some do, some don't; just as some support abortion, some don't, some attend church, some don't, some have safe sex, some don't, etc. I feel that those gays who absolutely must have baseball in their lives, should reserve their activities to solely gay organizations, such as The Gay Softball League...and never attend any mainstream heterosexual ballgames. Until now, I've always enjoyed reading your letters to the editor, for they are written by someone I actually know (as well as reading your delightful short stories amid the chaos, noise, and blatant rudeness of Castro Station). I am therefore surprised and disappointed (though not necessarily disillusioned, considering our latest argument) that you chose a topic unworthy of your brilliant intellect, and smeared it like used toilet tissue across this newspaper. (Peter, you really "struck out" this time!) Since neither the B.A.R. nor its readers deserve to be burdened by your post-earthquake traumas, please phone me to get it off your chest, instead of writing nasty, vindictive little letters to gay rags. Besides, you owe me an apology. (P.S.: I can't stand your new boyfriend!) ---finis ADDENDUM: My dear friend Peter has since passed away, two years after writing this letter was published. I remember what a good laugh we had over it!