Oh, wow, check these out: my first business cards as standup comedian. But not just any comedian:
!!! Jehovah's Queer Witness: Story Teller & Trickster !!!
So here are the original color and black & white designs:
The Blue Rose came to me in a vision some years back (1994?). It represents "The Blue Rose Militia", world's first Queer Militia. And the "Z-heart" is my street tag...for when I can't communicate with my street buddies in the normal way, I do graffiti ("Zeke" being my nickname).
I have since elaborated on the black & white version:
Since you can fit 10 business card images on a standard sheet of paper, I decided to conjure up a different quote for each card, starting with the one you see above:
- Funnier than a barrel of monkeys with hard-ons! -Prevert & Ropeher
- Funnier than a barrel of lesbian monkeys with puffy vaginas! -Dr. Juice Udders
- Funnier than a barrel of monkeys with vibrating wands! -Snoopy Snails
- Funnier than electric eels run loose in a boys locker room! -Mother Jonesing
- Funnier than a blue collar queer at the opera! -Weepee Her Man
- Breeders are gonna sue the hell outta this pervert! -Andrew Twice Laid
- The Oomph Boy of softcore comic pornography! -High Colonic Times
- A one-trick pony with lots of class and a very fine ass! -David Cop'afeel
- Accepts blow jobs by loyal fans...for me to poop on! -Tryoomph
- I can't believe it's not buggery! -Flabbio
Can you imagine handing out cards like these, when someone asks what you do for a living? Be assured: I'm having a blast! All the world's a stage, and it's still not big enough for me!
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